This is madness.
I cannot believe my own readers (of which there are 100 or so, as far as I can tell [not much, but hey–they’re mine]) do not support me in not supporting Poor Kyle’s remarriage.
Whose side are you all on, anyway? Poor Kyle is not the one who writes faithfully here every day (or night), laboring endlessly thinking of clever new topics to keep you entertained. You want to know a secret? He doesn’t even care about you much. Oh, sure, he reads your comments (which are becoming fewer and fewer lately. [Don’t think I haven’t noticed.]), but does he ever leave any of his own? No. It’s like he doesn’t even want to be connected with my blog, or any of you; as though we’re some strange distant relatives he only sees at family reunions every other year, and even then he doesn’t sit with us at lunch.
So how can you all be siding with him? Traitors.
The only one of you who has been loyal throughout my time of serious travail has been Anonymous #2 and #3, who I secretly suspect are the same person. So that is it; one person out of 100 agrees that I should be Poor Kyle’s one-and-only, and that I am right in my decision to haunt Poor Kyle if he ever remarries after I die young. And he or she won’t even leave his or her name.
If this doesn’t beat all.
The only thing you can do to make up for your mistreatment of me is to participate in the new survey I’m posting on the right sidebar. All you have to do is answer the following question:
If Camille took a page out of Bossy’s book and tried to go on an excellent road trip next summer, would you be interested in giving her a place to sleep at night?
That’s it. I was going to write a thrilling post complete with before-and-after photos, tense controversies, and personal life scandals…but now all you get is a lousy survey.
And it’s all you deserve, after yesterday’s abandonment. I hope you’re sorry.
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